'Write for Eureka Street? I don’t know. That's a proper, grown-up magazine. Serious business. I definitely don’t belong and any other time I got a piece published there was a total fluke. If I try again, I’ll get found out for sure. And who am I to speak as an authority on a subject? Oh no. Ick ick ick. ‘Oooh. Look at me! I know something!’ Who do I think I am? Ew. No. No thank you.' (Introduction)