'In 2009, the author gave birth at home to her third child, and second daughter, who was stillborn. This paper is about some of that experience of birth, police investigation, the coronial inquiry and the personal aftermath over the last seven years since the inquest. There was a three-year wait from birth to inquest which was a very long gestation and a time in which she could not speak out. Between her activism on behalf of birthing women through a long campaign by doctors and some midwives to remove consumer-driven homebirth from Australian women, and her refusal to be an obedient woman, public punishment had to be devised. The paper draws out the ways in which loss is described depending upon the perceived level of social compliance of the woman, or girl, who was pregnant, including experiences of pregnancy and birth that were made public such as those of Keli Lane, a young Australian woman convicted of murdering her baby.' (Publication abstract)